Drama

A woman’s propensity to create drama serves the purpose of ensuring emotional investment and security. Understanding the reasons why she needs this can soothe the minds of men who are sometimes exasperated by women’s need to “ruin a good thing.”

When we’re talking about drama, it is anything that invokes a feeling of being mistreated, or another word is indignation, but since so many elements of Game are correlated to her need to feel indignation, I’m going to continue to use “drama” as a catch-all. It’s also a word that most men have an experience with, whether good or bad. When we’re talking about Drama Queens, or the political drama at work, men often correlate negative emotions to the word as something that is often an annoyance and getting in the way of their goals. It’s expressed as annoying because men do not need to create drama to feel loved — I don’t think I’ll spin any heads with that one. However, it’s necessary to say due to the increasing feminization of male spaces, “drama” is already unavoidable, whether at work, in traditional male spaces, or of course with your plates, it’s there and yes it’s in your way. Now, accepting her visceral need for drama and what it tells her is the first step; the next is using it to your advantage.

Assurance of security is one side of the coin on woman’s dualistic sexual strategy. It’s not the whole picture, but it is the one side of her strategy that many unplugged men regularly adhere to, incorrectly, as the only side of her sexual strategy. These men employ their set of blue pill Game to meet her security needs because it’s still viewed as the right way to ensure intimacy. In their defense, her security needs are overtly communicated to him when she demands his commitment, along with a culture that pushes him to “man-up” and meet her provisioning needs. Men enter relationships with this thought process in mind, that her security needs come first, and maintain the relationship using the same reasoning.

In my post called Emotional Control, I outlined the necessity to remember that women do not communicate overtly, but rather covertly.

Beta males…still follow the social framework that women say what they mean.

Understanding this sets up the reason why her security needs are in direct conflict for her need to also feel anxious in the relationship; as such, believing her words at face value is a mistake, as I will explain.

While women communicate their need for security and peace, this doesn’t correlate with her behavior of creating drama. Watch the habits of your female co-workers, and in no time they will begin to gossip and induce an air of being mistreated by each other. Women will present themselves as the gatekeepers of peace and unity, but this is shown as false as they begin to tear into one another in the forms of passive aggression, gossip, and deception. I’d take a couple shots before, but watch 5 minutes of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, and there is a parade of women (and effeminate men) sobbing about how they were mistreated by someone else. If drama is not actively present in her life she can simply turn on the tube and binge on countless hours of reality TV. If she doesn’t have a TV she will gossip about her girlfriends to her “bestie.” If she isn’t around her confidant she will induce drama in her relationship with you.

Drama Satellite

This visceral need of creating drama is parallel to her need to use emotion to understand her place in the world. This is completely relative to her emotional perspective, but it does give her some very important information that allows her to make deductions about YOU particularly, and where she stands with you. There are studies that confirm women actually feel happier in a relationship knowing that her man is upset. This provides her with the information that she needs. If the man is emotionally upset this tells her he is also emotionally invested in the relationship. This confirms for her her need for security in the relationship, knowing that you will fight for it.

However, again, the security aspect is not the only part of her strategy at play here. This also goes back to knowing she doesn’t say what she means. Without understanding this men find themselves in a crossroads. Subsequently, when she begins to induce drama our reflexive reaction is to immediately relieve any thoughts of anxiety from her about the relationship. Under a blue pill social framework this would make sense as she says what she means, right? The other problem men face is this:

We don’t have time to deal with this fucking drama.

I don’t know how anyone can walk away sane knowing the fact that women are happier when men are upset in a relationship. While women are happier, men obviously are not happier with this aspect. It takes away our energy, and leaves us having to put out small fires when we’re supposed to be conquering the planet.

This is where the various elements of Game come to play. The first step is realizing that just because she has anxiety about the relationship, does not mean she should be relieved of it. In fact, most elements of Game already focus on how to create or use that anxiety to ensure her continued interest. Dread Game is based on this need to induce anxiety about her place in the relationship. Simply dressing better and going to the gym will immediately set off these dreadful queues for her. Anxiety is paired with her need to ensure she has held down a man that is better on the SMV scale than she is. It’s almost paradoxical, but if looked at closely, it makes sense for her to find the best man she can find, while also limiting his self-development so he doesn’t completely eclipse her own SMV, lose interest, and leave. Then her investment would be lost. It’s a fine line but she needs both security and anxiety. Too much security and she knows she hasn’t found a man that is better than she is. This is why relieving her of this anxiety is a bad idea, and in fact you should covertly encourage it.

The best way to deal with her drama is to ensure the drama is centered around you. As discussed earlier, she will find some reason to be feel mistreated, and that will leak out and ruin your time, relationships, and the people around you. If the drama is centered around you and you now know that she needs to feel this way, then you can use it as leverage. Simply introduce a couple levels of dread into your relationship, and she will anxiously  appreciate it. One that I believe is a good habit for maintaining boundaries (that she will try and break) is simply telling her No. The word no helps ensure that you’re still setting the Frame in the relationship and allows her to continue to operate in that Frame. While her reaction to No may not be one of thankfulness, the point is the need for drama does not distract you from your goals.

Emotional Control

A topic I believe that could use some expansion is the benefit of emotional control in a man’s life. When I say emotional control, I do not mean the suppression of emotions, but the proper display of them in a Red Pill context. This context serves as the foundation for emotional display, while also admitting that men have emotions and use them. The problem we have currently in an equalist definition of gender (while hypocritically catering to the feminine), is that displays of emotion more reserved for women are encouraged in men as well. Beta males jump on this opportunity to showcase their emotions as they still follow the social framework that women say what they mean. Any opportunity to showcase this perceived insight into the feminine, by believing what they say, and you have a whole culture of men trying to out e-mote one another. This is basic Red Pill: the incentive for men to display their emotions is the false belief they will be rewarded for their ability to understand, or communicate on an emotional level with women. The theory goes that like attracts like, that more feminine displays of emotion allows men to better relate to women, in another instance of the Beta asserting he’s different than those other assholes she regularly bemoans about.

In a Red Pill context most men already understand on a basic level that what she says does not correlate with what she means. This at first sounds illogical, and it would be under a perspective of a blue pill worldview. This worldview, as stated above, believes in an equalist definition of gender. If men believe women communicate overtly as men do, then men will also believe her when she says she deserves to know what he’s feeling.  However, what the Red Pill teaches is that she doesn’t communicate overtly, but rather covertly. This serves as the bed rock for understanding more intricate levels of Red Pill thought including the need for emotional control.

While we would like to claim we’re complete rational agents it’s painfully obvious we’re still at the mercy of our emotions. They still serve a functional purpose and they’re something we’re not going to run away from. What I’m advocating is the proper display of emotion in a Red Pill context, as opposed to the display of emotion in a Blue Pill context. One seeks to ensure emotions are kept in check to continue the perception of a man who is invulnerable —who can handle the stress of everyday life, and if need be her shit as well. The other seeks to display emotions in the hope showing a sense of vulnerability will make him more in tune with what women say they want: a caring, compassionate, sensitive partner –not what they actually want.

Under a Red Pill context, emotional control seeks the line of ensuring that our emotions do not run away on us and ruin a perception of a man that is invulnerable.  Again this is basic Red Pill: Women will never appreciate the stress, pain, sorrow, and difficulty it means to be a man. Not in a million years will they understand the sacrifice required to meet her egregious level of expectations whether that is the continual financial stability in a demanding job, nor the emotional support of her and her children. This is something she is biologically incapable of understanding, nor able to empathize in a way you would like. At the very least knowing this is simple pragmatism. There is no gain in rolling over and showing a sense of vulnerability in the hope she will appreciate it.

Hurricane

This sense of pragmatism in regards to emotional control serves as the foundation to how emotions should be expressed, and who to share them with. In my other post called Boy’s Don’t Cry, I dived in to the need to reign in emotions that destroy a sense of invulnerability. This perception plays into a woman’s hypergamous instinct of a man that is not manipulated by emotional terrorism, nor does he move simply because her emotions are unchecked. Regardless of how often women cry about men not sharing their feelings, this is not a call for one to vomit his most deepest struggles to her. Invariably, for all their crying about hard to read men, this is exactly the difference that attracts her to him. Less really is more, and it’s our differences that make men attractive, not our similarities. She needs to know that you are the wall that separates her willingness to lose control of her emotions, and your incessant drive to not give into them.

Any demand that you communicate with her by expressing your deepest feelings is simply a shit-test to get you to abandon your frame. Once you enter her frame you’ve lost control of the interaction, and she will lose respect. If she is in your frame then you’re free to poke at her emotional instability to get your desired results. This is why neg hits are so effective along with the idea of Amused Mastery. Any uncontrollable outburst from her is met with a knowing smirk that she’s not taken seriously, and her emotional outburst have little to no effect on your daily life. This bulwark is in direct contrast to the hurricane that is her instability, and reassures her that you’re a man that “gets it.”

There is a lot to talk about in regards to emotional control, and this post doesn’t do it justice. I purposely didn’t mention a specific emotion because of the impossibility of arguing one emotion is better than another. Every man has a different situational context when it comes to using a specific emotion. What is better is to mull over if expressing this particular emotion in a specific proportion will better contribute to a perception of strength and invulnerability, or will it do the opposite?

The Male Experience

The reason that women are both frightened and fascinated by the growth of the Red Pill is it’s threat to reveal the largely female dominant sexual strategy. The Red Pill is an evolutionary reaction on a meta-scale against a female dominant sexual strategy, fueled by feminist thought from the past 50 years.

A dominant sexual strategy is one that is agreed upon, subconsciously, by the general populace, on how the human species should reproduce.

It’s proof of the Red Pill’s unifying appeal, when men of different backgrounds, locations, status, and experiences, can come together on the internet to discuss their findings as to how they have attracted a particular woman. As these individual stories begin to accumulate, patterns emerge which form behavioral strategies. These commonalities and collective experiences, allow a consensus to be agreed upon in regards to the current state of intersexual dynamics. From this agreement, the Red Pill is born.

As of 2016, in Western society the female sexual strategy is dominant, and can be described in both short-term sexual strategy, and long-term sexual strategy, i.e: Alpha Fucks, Beta Bucks. One thing to keep in mind, and I’ll quote Rollo Tomassi here:

The Cardinal Rule of Sexual Strategies:
For one gender’s sexual strategy to succeed the other gender must compromise or abandon their own.

Alpha Fucks

Women inherently have pluralistic strategy in regards to mating. This strategy can be simplified to short-term, and long-term capacities. The short-term strategy is often expressed as Alpha Fucks, which pushes her to seek the highest quality male to gain the best genes for her children. Displays of Alpha characteristics in a man will set off arousal cues and is indicative of traits of social dominance, aggression, power, physicality, and other traits that are sexually arousing to women. It should be noted, that the term Alpha is a contentious one in The Red Pill, as there is no definitive definition as to what is an Alpha. Alpha is an abstract term, that changes according to the perceptions of each individual man.

Beta Bucks

The long-term strategy that women employ is called Beta Bucks. This strategy encourages her to seek out a partner that has an abundance of resources that she can use to provide for herself and her children. Personality traits of a Beta are indicative of validation seeking, one that supports her and her children both financially and emotionally. Beta partners have traits that are attractive to her, and should not be confused by sexually arousing, which explains Alpha traits.

The Male Experience

Each individual man will invariably have to navigate the Sexual Market Place. Some will find themselves gifted with a natural ability to successfully navigate this brutally competitive arena. Most will fall, bleed, doubt, suffer, and other-wise have to wrestle with exactly how they should successfully employ Game to attain their needs. At this present moment, the odds are stacked against most men who are raised inoculated to the Feminine Imperative. This same imperative that aggressively demands that men should abandon their strategy, to fulfill a woman’s sexual strategy, and be thankful while they’re at it. Anything less is outright misogyny. Anything acknowledging that the odds are not in a man’s favor, is a threat that needs to be squashed.

Before acknowledgment of a woman’s dualistic strategy is reached, men will have to come to terms either through pain or severe loss, as their own strategy that was approved by the Feminine Imperative crumbles in their hands. Why I’m so interested in writing this blog, is so men can have a second chance at seeing how their Blue Pill expectations on women really set them up for painful failure. Their story is like so many others: raised to serve the women around them by sacrificing their hopes and dreams in the hope that she will appreciate them. Only to be met by nothing more then her outright disdain.

At specific points in a woman’s lifetime, she is expecting different men that entail either Alpha or Beta traits. At 21, a woman’s sexual strategy is different then when she is at 31. At these different stages of a woman’s life, she will require a man that holds certain key traits to meet her sexual strategy of Alpha Fucks or Beta Bucks. What has been so damaging to relational equilibrium between the sexes is a now cultural desire to ensure that women’s sexual strategy is dominant. This assurance that women should have the dominant strategy is called Optimized Hypergamy, which materializes from individual women optimizing their hypergamy, which then extrapolates across communities to enforce laws and social norms to ensure that her sexual strategy is dominant. This can play out familiarly in a man’s life when at 18 you were so inclined to move to another state to goto the same college as your girlfriend. Only to have her dump you as she realizes she is entering a phase in her life where can use her most physically desirable years to seek an Alpha Fucks strategy. Years later at 30, this same women will notice as she ages that that Alpha Fucks strategy was a liability for her, as she seeks a man that will provide commitment to her. If her boyfriend balks at the idea of marriage he will be met with allegations of “commitment-phobic” and to “man-up” and do the right thing. Same woman, different key traits of men at different points in life, one dominant sexual strategy.

In the past, men either through social norms, religion, or laws limited a woman’s hypergamous tendencies. With the advent of the sexual revolution, and now entering 3rd wave feminism, most if not all these natural bulwarks against women optimizing hypergamy (and thus bringing more relational equilibrium) have all but been discarded.

The fallout is a sense of confusion and a desire for a correction. This is the Male Experience, as men are forced to reconcile that the same strategy of being Mr. Perfect has utterly failed them. While also acknowledging marriage in the 21st century is a risky proposition due to a cultural of unfettered hypergamy. This Experience accumulates in the Red Pill, which seeks to allow men to gain awareness of what women say they want, and what they actually want are two different things. It seeks to take off the veil of the “mysterious” nature of women, and acknowledge painful truths of how women love. Acknowledgment of these core truths will ultimately help men navigate the arena, and to reach a level of sanity as they struggle to wrestle with these uncomfortable truths.

Designed Pain

There are 5 stages of grief associated with unplugging from a Blue Pill perspective. These stages of grief are the common reaction to having to confront an otherwise hidden and painful truth. When a man unplugs from the Feminine Imperative, and is cast into a new social dynamic, he may react the same way one reacts to the death of a close family member:

  1. Denial
  2. Anger
  3. Bargaining
  4. Depression
  5. Acceptance

It’s been said often in Red Pill circles, that it’s generally unwise to mention the Red Pill overtly to an otherwise still plugged in man. The reactions to these “misogynistic” ideas will be met at the least with mild incredulity or at worst outright contempt. More then one friendship has been destroyed by well-meaning Red Pill men, as they try to help their Blue Pill buddies who are trapped in a lifetime of pleasing the Feminine Imperative.

Of course we want to help these men that are close to us, as we remember our own plight and how now things are much more realistic by understanding women’s innate need to optimize their hypergamy. We remember our own painful pasts of fruitlessly following the advice of countless well-meaning women to be ourselves or just be nice and the laws of the universe will give us more pussy.

I believe it’s a disservice to yourself and your Blue Pill friend to mention the Red Pill before they’re unwilling to take it. One, you risk ostracizing yourself from a social circle that is so steeped in a Blue Pill perspective that they will never be able to understand that you hold their best interests at heart. No matter how logical you sound, you’re asking them to abandon their most cherished fantasies. From their perspective you’re asking them to hand over all their hopes and dreams. We’re talking about their sexual strategy here, and that is one strategy that men will defend with their very lives. Every man has Game, and Blue Pill men are no different.

Purpose of Pain

Going back the 5 stages of grief; I believe it’s necessary that men have to face a serious loss of an ideal before they’ll begin to question any tightly held beliefs about women’s sexual strategy. When men are faced with losing everything while they were simultaneously told that being Mr. Perfect will give them everything, they begin to question those assumptions. The fallout from a failed relationship, one in which was founded on Blue Pill ideals, will force a man to ask the right questions as to why it failed. When a child puts their hand on a hot stove without realizing they will get burned, pain immediately forces them to remove their hand. This painful shock will inoculate them from ever touching a hot stove again. There is a evolutionary purpose behind depression that forces us to examine whether our current goals are improving our ability of survival. Dr. Jonathan Rottenberg is the author of The Depths: The Evolutionary Origins of the Depression Epidemic, in which he argues that depression or low mood serves a purpose in examining our current setting and whether changes to this environment should be made. Dr. Rottenberg did a interview with Brett McKay of the Art of Manliness, where he expounds on the purpose of depression:

Low mood makes us stop. It makes us analyze the environment really carefully. Parts of it so you don’t repeat the same mistakes that got us into this situation in the first place.

When a frustrated man that has spent most of his life following the rules given to him since birth, rules which will ultimately fail him when it comes to a relationship with a woman, he understandably begins the stages of grief. At this time, pain serves as a necessary stepping stone to swallowing the Red Pill, as he is confronted with the reality that his Blue Pill sexual strategy ultimately failed him. It’s even more frustrating when you consider that this same strategy had the seal of approval from all women up to that point as the correct one. Nice guy…check, dependable…check, understanding…check, romantic…check, and then when this perspective is finally tested with his dream girl he is eventually rejected or dumped.

At this point, when he is in this depressive state he may be trying to understand what exactly went wrong with his past relationship. It serves as a survival mechanism for him to really be honest with the entire environment that he had depended on to ensure intimacy with his dream girl. He instinctively will begin to try and piece together the events surrounding to the failing of his relationship. However, without a Red Pill context, he will be unable to accurately describe the social dynamics at play surrounding the failed relationship. If he doesn’t receive or accept a Red Pill perspective, he will fall back to his Blue Pill idealism over time; as he begins to accept that the relationship is over. During that critical time a Red Pill friend may (the key word is may) be able to provide a context, albeit a bitter one, that will ultimately give him the correct perspective of women’s sexual strategy, and how he can reinvent himself to play the Game with more accurate knowledge.