A Victim of Hypergamy

There is a growing trend in the movie industry of the heroine which is contrasted to the older trend of the hero. It’s an appeal to the blue pill experience that says women are the only true holders of virtue, while men are usually the disorderly and unvirtuous. If you have a problem, only a women has the tact and discipline to solve it.

Unfortunately, that idea is not true in the slightest in reality. On moral conditions alone, the assertion that women have a greater semblance of morality or what we call right and wrong is only if the surrounding environment strictly enforces it into her subconscious.

The same is true when it comes to limiting hypergamy, and as others would say, limiting the degradation of morals. Hypergamy is limited only if the surrounding environment enforces it’s limitation. Much of the social conflict in the West is a byproduct of the slow ease of this limitation, so that in layman’s terms: women can fuck freely. Any time you hear of most feminist tropes today it revolves on the idea that women should be able to fuck whoever they want, whenever they want, while their at that stage in their life (Alpha Fucks). The other side of the coin is that men should commit to them whenever they deem commitment a worthwhile sexual strategy (Beta Bucks). Both are paradoxical at the same time, but they both make up the same sexual strategy of women.

The optimization of this strategy flies in the face of men’s expectations, traditions, and beliefs. When we encounter the idea that women are simply optimizing their hypergamy it’s a real tough pill to swallow. Sometimes it takes a gigantic punch to the gut to realize it’s truth, and sometimes this punch comes in the worst way.

Watch the following video to get a better idea of a man’s whole world crashing in on him:

“18 fucking years, gone!!”

That’s the sound of a man realizing that his wife doesn’t care that they were married for 18 years. That’s the sound of a man that is realizing that any expectations he had of faithful marriage doesn’t matter as long as her hypergamy is optimized by being able to fuck Chad.

As Rollo would say, “Hypergamy doesn’t care.”

It really doesn’t. Every man should be aware that hypergamy isn’t some sort of villain, it’s a byproduct of pragmatism. Without hypergamy we wouldn’t be here as a human species today. At the same time, our expectations of women in keeping their hypergamy in check is a dubious one at best. Women are told to optimize their hypergamy constantly, and anyone getting in the way of that is a woman-hater. Damn your marriage vows.

Many of us that have taken the red pill have experienced something like this or even worse. This is the rough side of the pill and I wish this man the best of luck. I hope he is able to find The Red Pill and realize things are not over for him, that he can re-invent himself without the wrong expectations of women.

The Great Uncucking

There seems to be a branding crisis currently in the Red Pill. Why is it even called the Red Pill in the first place? Obviously “taking the red pill” is from the movie The Matrix, which is  popular in the idea of realizing an otherwise hidden, but important truth, hiding in plain sight. It’s a great flick. It’s popular due to the ease in which the term “taking the red pill” can fit into many different contexts, like the realization that women are hypergamous and are not built to love idealistically as men do, but rather opportunistically.

Recently, mainly due to the U.S. elections the use of the red pill has become increasingly popular in the alt-right spheres. Taking this red pill in relation to the alt-right is centered around race-realism, and the disestablishment of multiculturalism and the survival of one’s own group.

There are attempts being made to corner this brand of the use of the red pill to be in sole-relation to the manosphere. I honestly think that is an unattainable goal due to the free-flowing nature of ideas on the internet. The Reddit sub The Red Pill is quite popular and can arguably be the largest gathering of individuals actively using the term the red pill, but it wasn’t the first nor will it be the last. Besides the movie, the term the red pill can be traced back as far as a blogger named Mencius Moldbug who has run a blog called Unqualified Reservations since 2007.  Mencius Moldbug has nothing to do with the red pill in relation to the manosphere, but uses the term to describe his own thoughts on the usefulness of classical liberal democracy — his views are unpopular to his view of the majority of blue pill believers in democracy.

The point here is that using the term “taking the red pill” has gotten away from the manosphere and is now largely a counter-culture movement of the common beliefs of most of what we hold dear. Regardless of your personal opinion of the alt-right or the manosphere, things are changing as commonly held beliefs on women and politics seem to not be working. PA states it very well:

Rebirth. Or, nationalism’s renaissance men. Be your best self. The Red Pill blogs — manosphere, pick-up, White nationalism, neoreaction — converged on a wholesale rejection of neoliberal virtues: tolerance, supplication, political correctness (lies), nihilism, ignorance. Do you even lift?

I’ll be sticking to talking about The Red Pill as it has to do with men and their disillusions with women. I think that is one of the best ways to help men as it becomes even more apparent these common problems outlined in this blog will not go away, but men can be prepared to face them, and hopefully help each other see these red pill truths. Whether that is a stepping stone to other ideas is not my prerogative. Mark my words: Belonging to any faction of the red pill will get you labeled a racist, misogynist, or whatever term is popular today to attack the messenger, and not the message. These are unpopular ideas, and as “taking the red pill” grows in various forms, it will put a bigger target on any part of it.

I call it the great uncucking due to it’s systematic threat it poses to the power structures today. Whether that is your loss of respect in your own family, or the dependency that men are no better than mules, showing the underbelly of this beast is going to mean trouble.

Regardless of this threat, the benefits to each individual man are too great; which also coalesces to the larger benefits of society at large. Men are better off when they understand their value that is not dictated by the feminine imperative.

Whether this great uncucking coalesces to something larger, I sure hope it does — it will be interesting to see.

Churchianity

I was right in the middle of writing another blog post when I was thrown a curve ball about a Christian mommy blogger named Glennon Doyle Melton. Glennon writes for a blog called Momastery, which is your typical new-age, feminist, Eat Pray Love blog that masquerades as a Christian website to help “traumatized” married women. One of her posts has gone viral, titled, I Need To Tell You Something, where she informs her thousands of post-wall divorcees and married followers that she is divorcing her husband, Craig. She tells the story of breaking the news to Craig that she is through with their marriage; Craig as a beta man should, respects her decision with tears as an “act of love.” The next couple of paragraphs are Glennon hamstering away her decision to divorce her  husband and start a new life along with the Eat, Pray, Love crowd. None of the reasons are coherent, and include a lot of emotional and abstract thinking that have no place in reality. At the end of her confession is a nice reminder to buy her new book aptly called Love Warrior.

My post titled Christian Idols first dove into Christian marriage defined by the Feminine Imperative. It’s a reminder to men that “Christian” marriage is no insulation from divorce:

Yes, even Christian women are prone to going feral — it does not matter… understand that just because she’s a Christian woman does not mean she is not prone to hypergamy.

There are a number of points to take away from when looking at Glennon’s actions that show lessons for Christian men, secular men, or anyone in between. The most important is that AWALT (all women are like that) still holds true here, and a proper understanding of it will allow you to have the right expectations of women as they age regardless of cultural structures, I.E, religion. AWALT is not saying that all women will do said action, but rather that all women have the potential to optimize hypergamy. This instinct is the fulfilling of what is described in the post The Male Experience, that women will fulfill their sexual strategy of alpha fucks and beta bucks.

In Glennon’s case as a 40 year old woman she is right on schedule to re-ignite her alpha fucks phase. This happens as she realizes that being married to a dutiful beta husband, who “respects” her decision to leave him wasn’t all it was caked out to be.

It’s important to note that while Christian women are inclined to present a version of themselves as always being chaste, this is of course the opposite to the eventual detriment of their dutiful husbands, who believe that their time has finally come to find their “one true love.” They have been waiting for almost a decade to finally meet someone they believe is worth marrying, under the basis that all their hard work of being a dependable, caring man has finally paid off. The reality is of course much more pragmatic — if not cold. During her late 20s many women find themselves approaching The Wall, and are left scrambling to find a dependable source of security, as they switch from the alpha fucks strategy to a beta bucks one. At this stage in her life this is when most Christian women become “Christian.” There is no better place to find a bed of security than at your neighborhood church, where for the past decade in a man’s life feminized preachers have been demanding that he do his duty, man-up, and commit to these women that have finally seen the light. These men are more than happy to do their part, as they have been shamed and ridiculed as “kidults.” Interestingly, for all the churches bemoaning what a sad state of affairs masculinity is, there is no shortage of men willing to commit to these women. At any evangelical church in America today there will always be at least one month dedicated to sermons for men to “man-up” and meet these post-wall women in the middle.

Feminists Behind the Pulpit

It needs to be said that taking The Red Pill in regards to current socio-sexual dynamics at play in the United States and abroad, does not mean men have to adopt a certain religion or a certain political party. This belief stems from the idea that there are certain types of women, and that if you marry into that type that is perceived as a “quality” women then you will be insulated from their hypergamous insticts. That is where a lot of mistakes are made for men, as they relax their guard and fall asleep in a blissful-beta cocoon. Women who claim to be religious are just as hypergamous as any secular woman. There really is no difference, only in approach. As I have mentioned before in other posts, divorce rates and adultery are almost parallel in Christian circles as they are in secular ones. What needs to be taken away from this fact is regardless of upbringing, women will always follow the path of least-resistance if there is ample opportunity and reason to do so.

Unfortunately, the idea that men can find a “good” wife at a church is just unrealistic at this point. The church as mentioned above has been hijacked by feminist preachers that AMOG other men to follow their belief that it’s necessary to commit to these post-wall women into marriage. These same women who now realize their options are running out after their Alpha Fucks phase in their twenties have changed their tune. Since the majority of church goers are women, and since women will pay their salaries, these feminized preachers are happily ready to incorporate the Feminine Imperative into their sermons.

It doesn’t end there as the church will repeatedly instruct these newly married men to focus on building attraction by being a “good husband.” While at the same time the wife loses respect and interest in sex. Notice the pattern here? These same tropes of commitment to serve her sexual imperative are the same ones parroted by feminists in the media. Ultimately, it is bought in by beta-men who incorporate it as the way to live, only to find themselves divorced by their 40s.

The takeaway here is that most single-Christian men are pushing for an already made deal by hoping that they find a woman that is insulated from mainstream hypergamy. In reality is what they find is women who have gone through their Alpha Fucks stage and have decided to cash their chips in by masquerading as “born-again.” This combination means men finally feel their ship has pulled in and they can finally relax from the idea of women optimizing their hypergamy due to their religious convictions. Unfortunately, as we all know and have witnessed this is not the case in the slightest.

The Church is no insulation from runaway hypergamy. In many ways it’s actually worse.

Drama

A woman’s propensity to create drama serves the purpose of ensuring emotional investment and security. Understanding the reasons why she needs this can soothe the minds of men who are sometimes exasperated by women’s need to “ruin a good thing.”

When we’re talking about drama, it is anything that invokes a feeling of being mistreated, or another word is indignation, but since so many elements of Game are correlated to her need to feel indignation, I’m going to continue to use “drama” as a catch-all. It’s also a word that most men have an experience with, whether good or bad. When we’re talking about Drama Queens, or the political drama at work, men often correlate negative emotions to the word as something that is often an annoyance and getting in the way of their goals. It’s expressed as annoying because men do not need to create drama to feel loved — I don’t think I’ll spin any heads with that one. However, it’s necessary to say due to the increasing feminization of male spaces, “drama” is already unavoidable, whether at work, in traditional male spaces, or of course with your plates, it’s there and yes it’s in your way. Now, accepting her visceral need for drama and what it tells her is the first step; the next is using it to your advantage.

Assurance of security is one side of the coin on woman’s dualistic sexual strategy. It’s not the whole picture, but it is the one side of her strategy that many unplugged men regularly adhere to, incorrectly, as the only side of her sexual strategy. These men employ their set of blue pill Game to meet her security needs because it’s still viewed as the right way to ensure intimacy. In their defense, her security needs are overtly communicated to him when she demands his commitment, along with a culture that pushes him to “man-up” and meet her provisioning needs. Men enter relationships with this thought process in mind, that her security needs come first, and maintain the relationship using the same reasoning.

In my post called Emotional Control, I outlined the necessity to remember that women do not communicate overtly, but rather covertly.

Beta males…still follow the social framework that women say what they mean.

Understanding this sets up the reason why her security needs are in direct conflict for her need to also feel anxious in the relationship; as such, believing her words at face value is a mistake, as I will explain.

While women communicate their need for security and peace, this doesn’t correlate with her behavior of creating drama. Watch the habits of your female co-workers, and in no time they will begin to gossip and induce an air of being mistreated by each other. Women will present themselves as the gatekeepers of peace and unity, but this is shown as false as they begin to tear into one another in the forms of passive aggression, gossip, and deception. I’d take a couple shots before, but watch 5 minutes of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, and there is a parade of women (and effeminate men) sobbing about how they were mistreated by someone else. If drama is not actively present in her life she can simply turn on the tube and binge on countless hours of reality TV. If she doesn’t have a TV she will gossip about her girlfriends to her “bestie.” If she isn’t around her confidant she will induce drama in her relationship with you.

Drama Satellite

This visceral need of creating drama is parallel to her need to use emotion to understand her place in the world. This is completely relative to her emotional perspective, but it does give her some very important information that allows her to make deductions about YOU particularly, and where she stands with you. There are studies that confirm women actually feel happier in a relationship knowing that her man is upset. This provides her with the information that she needs. If the man is emotionally upset this tells her he is also emotionally invested in the relationship. This confirms for her her need for security in the relationship, knowing that you will fight for it.

However, again, the security aspect is not the only part of her strategy at play here. This also goes back to knowing she doesn’t say what she means. Without understanding this men find themselves in a crossroads. Subsequently, when she begins to induce drama our reflexive reaction is to immediately relieve any thoughts of anxiety from her about the relationship. Under a blue pill social framework this would make sense as she says what she means, right? The other problem men face is this:

We don’t have time to deal with this fucking drama.

I don’t know how anyone can walk away sane knowing the fact that women are happier when men are upset in a relationship. While women are happier, men obviously are not happier with this aspect. It takes away our energy, and leaves us having to put out small fires when we’re supposed to be conquering the planet.

This is where the various elements of Game come to play. The first step is realizing that just because she has anxiety about the relationship, does not mean she should be relieved of it. In fact, most elements of Game already focus on how to create or use that anxiety to ensure her continued interest. Dread Game is based on this need to induce anxiety about her place in the relationship. Simply dressing better and going to the gym will immediately set off these dreadful queues for her. Anxiety is paired with her need to ensure she has held down a man that is better on the SMV scale than she is. It’s almost paradoxical, but if looked at closely, it makes sense for her to find the best man she can find, while also limiting his self-development so he doesn’t completely eclipse her own SMV, lose interest, and leave. Then her investment would be lost. It’s a fine line but she needs both security and anxiety. Too much security and she knows she hasn’t found a man that is better than she is. This is why relieving her of this anxiety is a bad idea, and in fact you should covertly encourage it.

The best way to deal with her drama is to ensure the drama is centered around you. As discussed earlier, she will find some reason to be feel mistreated, and that will leak out and ruin your time, relationships, and the people around you. If the drama is centered around you and you now know that she needs to feel this way, then you can use it as leverage. Simply introduce a couple levels of dread into your relationship, and she will anxiously  appreciate it. One that I believe is a good habit for maintaining boundaries (that she will try and break) is simply telling her No. The word no helps ensure that you’re still setting the Frame in the relationship and allows her to continue to operate in that Frame. While her reaction to No may not be one of thankfulness, the point is the need for drama does not distract you from your goals.

Emotional Control

A topic I believe that could use some expansion is the benefit of emotional control in a man’s life. When I say emotional control, I do not mean the suppression of emotions, but the proper display of them in a Red Pill context. This context serves as the foundation for emotional display, while also admitting that men have emotions and use them. The problem we have currently in an equalist definition of gender (while hypocritically catering to the feminine), is that displays of emotion more reserved for women are encouraged in men as well. Beta males jump on this opportunity to showcase their emotions as they still follow the social framework that women say what they mean. Any opportunity to showcase this perceived insight into the feminine, by believing what they say, and you have a whole culture of men trying to out e-mote one another. This is basic Red Pill: the incentive for men to display their emotions is the false belief they will be rewarded for their ability to understand, or communicate on an emotional level with women. The theory goes that like attracts like, that more feminine displays of emotion allows men to better relate to women, in another instance of the Beta asserting he’s different than those other assholes she regularly bemoans about.

In a Red Pill context most men already understand on a basic level that what she says does not correlate with what she means. This at first sounds illogical, and it would be under a perspective of a blue pill worldview. This worldview, as stated above, believes in an equalist definition of gender. If men believe women communicate overtly as men do, then men will also believe her when she says she deserves to know what he’s feeling.  However, what the Red Pill teaches is that she doesn’t communicate overtly, but rather covertly. This serves as the bed rock for understanding more intricate levels of Red Pill thought including the need for emotional control.

While we would like to claim we’re complete rational agents it’s painfully obvious we’re still at the mercy of our emotions. They still serve a functional purpose and they’re something we’re not going to run away from. What I’m advocating is the proper display of emotion in a Red Pill context, as opposed to the display of emotion in a Blue Pill context. One seeks to ensure emotions are kept in check to continue the perception of a man who is invulnerable —who can handle the stress of everyday life, and if need be her shit as well. The other seeks to display emotions in the hope showing a sense of vulnerability will make him more in tune with what women say they want: a caring, compassionate, sensitive partner –not what they actually want.

Under a Red Pill context, emotional control seeks the line of ensuring that our emotions do not run away on us and ruin a perception of a man that is invulnerable.  Again this is basic Red Pill: Women will never appreciate the stress, pain, sorrow, and difficulty it means to be a man. Not in a million years will they understand the sacrifice required to meet her egregious level of expectations whether that is the continual financial stability in a demanding job, nor the emotional support of her and her children. This is something she is biologically incapable of understanding, nor able to empathize in a way you would like. At the very least knowing this is simple pragmatism. There is no gain in rolling over and showing a sense of vulnerability in the hope she will appreciate it.

Hurricane

This sense of pragmatism in regards to emotional control serves as the foundation to how emotions should be expressed, and who to share them with. In my other post called Boy’s Don’t Cry, I dived in to the need to reign in emotions that destroy a sense of invulnerability. This perception plays into a woman’s hypergamous instinct of a man that is not manipulated by emotional terrorism, nor does he move simply because her emotions are unchecked. Regardless of how often women cry about men not sharing their feelings, this is not a call for one to vomit his most deepest struggles to her. Invariably, for all their crying about hard to read men, this is exactly the difference that attracts her to him. Less really is more, and it’s our differences that make men attractive, not our similarities. She needs to know that you are the wall that separates her willingness to lose control of her emotions, and your incessant drive to not give into them.

Any demand that you communicate with her by expressing your deepest feelings is simply a shit-test to get you to abandon your frame. Once you enter her frame you’ve lost control of the interaction, and she will lose respect. If she is in your frame then you’re free to poke at her emotional instability to get your desired results. This is why neg hits are so effective along with the idea of Amused Mastery. Any uncontrollable outburst from her is met with a knowing smirk that she’s not taken seriously, and her emotional outburst have little to no effect on your daily life. This bulwark is in direct contrast to the hurricane that is her instability, and reassures her that you’re a man that “gets it.”

There is a lot to talk about in regards to emotional control, and this post doesn’t do it justice. I purposely didn’t mention a specific emotion because of the impossibility of arguing one emotion is better than another. Every man has a different situational context when it comes to using a specific emotion. What is better is to mull over if expressing this particular emotion in a specific proportion will better contribute to a perception of strength and invulnerability, or will it do the opposite?

You’re Not Crazy

I believe men are as powerful as they can be as long as they have the correct information to make good decisions. To expand, men are currently in a deficit with needed knowledge to successfully navigate important areas of their life, whether that is women, finances, or their career. These pillars represent areas that can make or break a man. Many here have made mistakes in the past and found themselves searching for answers. Why did she leave? Why is she not sleeping with me? Why is she constantly breaking my balls? We’re doers, thinkers, and problem solvers, and nothing is more frustrating to have questions that seem to have no rational answers to them.

Enter the Red Pill

The Red Pill has made an entrance just in time to give a semblance of answers. At the very least telling one of the dangers he faces as he navigates the Sexual Market Place. The dangers are there, and many have already fallen trap to being the nice guy, the beta provider, or the caring, supportive boyfriend — only for it all to fall apart. It happened. In fact I believe without the knowledge to avoid these traps, that one will continue to let them happen. The Red Pill gives you the proper knowledge to understand the behavioral aspects behind why women do what they do, and how realistic expectations on women can give you leverage on how to interact with them. Too often we hear or maybe personally experience someone’s life being fundamentally changed due to the decisions of their spouse. Too often is it heard, “It’s like I never even knew her.” Yes, you didn’t know then, but now you do. You now know women are pragmatic who follow their hypergamous instincts of Alpha Fucks, Beta Bucks.

If one were to be honest with himself, and acknowledge that he doesn’t have all the answers, steps can be made to change his future. At the very least he can be more prepared for some of the land mines he will invariably come across. Further, if a man refuses to take responsibility for his life no one can say that he wasn’t warned.

Warnings

We all know what these warning are; we’ve seen ample evidence that these are potential land mines for the average man.

Marriage
In today’s social climate marriage is simply a bad proposition for men. While I’m all for marriage, there is inherently a lot of risk, with little reward. Shit tests invariably increase as you lose your biggest leverage: commitment. The opposite is inversely true for women; marriage is high reward and low risk. At the worst for her it doesn’t work out and she still walks away with child support, alimony, and half your shit, while you’re sleeping on a futon at your buddy’s apartment. Again, I’m pro-marriage, but only marriage that men absolutely understand the risks involved.
Dualistic Nature of Women
Women’s sexual strategy is dualistic in nature, depending on the different time of her life, her strategy revolves around Alpha and Beta abstractions. Most men here already know this, but to those that don’t, the goal is to eliminate Beta behavior, and increase Alpha behavior, or behavior that is indicative of being an Alpha. Under no circumstances should you fall into the trap of being a women’s Beta Bucks at 30, after she has spent the last 12 years on the cock carousel. No matter how many times you’re told to “man up” and commit, they are the same people rah rahing her desire to fuck as many chads as she can in her 20s. Again, your best interest’s are not the point here, it’s all about her sexual strategy, which you’re encouraged to support without any question.
I don’t think the Red Pill is here to determine what life style a man should have or want. Whether one wants to get married or not, that is his own prerogative. What it does offer is the acknowledgment of the social-sexual dynamic at it’s current state. At the very least, from collective experience, it’s apparent that these areas are potential tripping points and need to be acknowledged. There are plenty more to talk about, but that is for another post.

You’re Not Crazy

Let me close by acknowledging how the Red Pill can fundamentally alter your behavioral schema for the better, and what that means for the future. Before swallowing that bitter pill, I believe many men were subject to the whims of the Feminine Imperative, i.e., the assurance that women will be able to successfully satisfy their sexual strategy. This is of course at odds with men’s best interests, but for so many men, inoculated in a culture to ensure her needs over his, it takes a painful experience to wake a man up from this slumber. This is where the Red Pill can come in and show the behavioral schema he followed before: to play nice, to be supportive and caring, was inherently flawed in today’s social climate. What’s even more painful is the idea of how invested he was that doing these Beta things will work. After all, he was told by countless women, from his mom, sisters, friends, and even the movies he watched, all confirmed this is how he attained his needs, only for it to fall apart. Once this happens, this is enough to induce madness on any man.

I did everything she wanted… It wasn’t what she wanted.

I know this frustrating feeling very well. When I was 20, I met a young woman who I quickly grew emotionally attached to. I pulled out my blue pill rule book on how to win her over. It went OK for about 6 months before it started to fall apart. In my desperation I tried harder with my blue pill rule book, doing everything she said would work, only to be met by her revulsion. This was my wake up call. While the breakup sucked, what was more maddening was the thought it could happen again, and again. I couldn’t get one thought out of my head: What the fuck just happened? I felt like I was taking crazy pills as I did everything I was told would work by countless women, by countless plugged in men, by a whole culture sapped in the Feminine Imperative, only for it to blow up in my hands. Obviously there was something going on here that I just couldn’t figure out. I look back now and chuckle at my ignorance. I chuckle now at how I could even be so emotionally attached to another creature with flaws like anyone else. However, what was so maddening for many men, myself included, is the idea that things are not as they seem. That logic can only get you so far when you’re playing the Game while still plugged in. In reality, you’re playing the Game blindfolded, with both of you hands tied behind your back.

Some men are not laughing, as they get half their assets taken from them. Or forced to see their kids only once every two weeks, while their exes do everything in their power to make their kids resent them. They’re sitting in a one bedroom apartment thinking the same thing, What the fuck just happened? Then they stumble on some internet forums, and someone mentions the Red Pill. Intrigued, they do some searching, some digging, and the pieces start to come together. They deny it’s truth, they say, “Nah women are not like that.” They ignore, bargain, walk away, come back, get angry, and finally accept it’s true. Like an ice-cold drink on a hot summers day, it soothes their mind and they realize, I’m not crazy. Things are not as they seem, but I can adapt, I can thrive in this environment.

You’re not crazy, you just had wrong expectations of women. You believed that they inherently hold your best interests before her own. That she’s not pragmatic, and that she’s the true romantic. That what she says outweighs what she does. You’re not crazy, you were mired in a behavioral schema that wasn’t designed with your best interests in mind.

Yeah, you messed up, but I’d rather fail with at least a semblance on how to not fail again. At least give me the fucking courtesy to try and fix my shit. The alternative is being lost in the forest, unable to see the forest for the trees. Well, here you go, the tools and the knowledge are right here. It’s up to you on how much or how little you use them.

 

Irrational Self-Confidence

It’s much better to be irrationally self-confident then to be rationally unsure of your abilities.

I’ve seen it over and over again; the nice guy that tries his best, that repeatedly tries with good-intentions, but does so with a lack of confidence. He’s unsure of whether his particular idea or plan will pass. Many times his idea is a great idea; his plan will work, it’s well thought out. Then when he presents it, he does so with a lack of confidence. This lack translates to his idea that it’s not a good idea, that it’s not a good plan. It doesn’t matter what it is, whether you’re telling a girl where to eat, or telling your boss the latest update on your work. Giving any idea, any plan, and doing so with a lack of confidence has a greater negative effect then on the perceived positive of the idea.

People are outright punished for being unsure of themselves. You’re liked less and trusted less. It’s a sad state of affairs, but the sooner you realize that any hint of insecurity is viewed as worse then the desire to avoid being wrong.

Embrace a sense of irrational self-confidence.

Being over-confident in your abilities is a better path to selling your ideas then being unsure of their success. What you’re trying to sell is your idea, and as long as you’re a sane human being, it’s probably an idea worth selling. Doing so in a confident way tells another person that the idea is worth looking into, otherwise you wouldn’t feel so strongly about it. Stride through the world without apologies and without hesitation. Every thing you do, do so with a purpose. Yes, you’ll fuck up, but again, it’s 30 lashes for being insecure and 10 for being wrong.