Emotional Control

A topic I believe that could use some expansion is the benefit of emotional control in a man’s life. When I say emotional control, I do not mean the suppression of emotions, but the proper display of them in a Red Pill context. This context serves as the foundation for emotional display, while also admitting that men have emotions and use them. The problem we have currently in an equalist definition of gender (while hypocritically catering to the feminine), is that displays of emotion more reserved for women are encouraged in men as well. Beta males jump on this opportunity to showcase their emotions as they still follow the social framework that women say what they mean. Any opportunity to showcase this perceived insight into the feminine, by believing what they say, and you have a whole culture of men trying to out e-mote one another. This is basic Red Pill: the incentive for men to display their emotions is the false belief they will be rewarded for their ability to understand, or communicate on an emotional level with women. The theory goes that like attracts like, that more feminine displays of emotion allows men to better relate to women, in another instance of the Beta asserting he’s different than those other assholes she regularly bemoans about.

In a Red Pill context most men already understand on a basic level that what she says does not correlate with what she means. This at first sounds illogical, and it would be under a perspective of a blue pill worldview. This worldview, as stated above, believes in an equalist definition of gender. If men believe women communicate overtly as men do, then men will also believe her when she says she deserves to know what he’s feeling.  However, what the Red Pill teaches is that she doesn’t communicate overtly, but rather covertly. This serves as the bed rock for understanding more intricate levels of Red Pill thought including the need for emotional control.

While we would like to claim we’re complete rational agents it’s painfully obvious we’re still at the mercy of our emotions. They still serve a functional purpose and they’re something we’re not going to run away from. What I’m advocating is the proper display of emotion in a Red Pill context, as opposed to the display of emotion in a Blue Pill context. One seeks to ensure emotions are kept in check to continue the perception of a man who is invulnerable —who can handle the stress of everyday life, and if need be her shit as well. The other seeks to display emotions in the hope showing a sense of vulnerability will make him more in tune with what women say they want: a caring, compassionate, sensitive partner –not what they actually want.

Under a Red Pill context, emotional control seeks the line of ensuring that our emotions do not run away on us and ruin a perception of a man that is invulnerable.  Again this is basic Red Pill: Women will never appreciate the stress, pain, sorrow, and difficulty it means to be a man. Not in a million years will they understand the sacrifice required to meet her egregious level of expectations whether that is the continual financial stability in a demanding job, nor the emotional support of her and her children. This is something she is biologically incapable of understanding, nor able to empathize in a way you would like. At the very least knowing this is simple pragmatism. There is no gain in rolling over and showing a sense of vulnerability in the hope she will appreciate it.

Hurricane

This sense of pragmatism in regards to emotional control serves as the foundation to how emotions should be expressed, and who to share them with. In my other post called Boy’s Don’t Cry, I dived in to the need to reign in emotions that destroy a sense of invulnerability. This perception plays into a woman’s hypergamous instinct of a man that is not manipulated by emotional terrorism, nor does he move simply because her emotions are unchecked. Regardless of how often women cry about men not sharing their feelings, this is not a call for one to vomit his most deepest struggles to her. Invariably, for all their crying about hard to read men, this is exactly the difference that attracts her to him. Less really is more, and it’s our differences that make men attractive, not our similarities. She needs to know that you are the wall that separates her willingness to lose control of her emotions, and your incessant drive to not give into them.

Any demand that you communicate with her by expressing your deepest feelings is simply a shit-test to get you to abandon your frame. Once you enter her frame you’ve lost control of the interaction, and she will lose respect. If she is in your frame then you’re free to poke at her emotional instability to get your desired results. This is why neg hits are so effective along with the idea of Amused Mastery. Any uncontrollable outburst from her is met with a knowing smirk that she’s not taken seriously, and her emotional outburst have little to no effect on your daily life. This bulwark is in direct contrast to the hurricane that is her instability, and reassures her that you’re a man that “gets it.”

There is a lot to talk about in regards to emotional control, and this post doesn’t do it justice. I purposely didn’t mention a specific emotion because of the impossibility of arguing one emotion is better than another. Every man has a different situational context when it comes to using a specific emotion. What is better is to mull over if expressing this particular emotion in a specific proportion will better contribute to a perception of strength and invulnerability, or will it do the opposite?

You’re Not Crazy

I believe men are as powerful as they can be as long as they have the correct information to make good decisions. To expand, men are currently in a deficit with needed knowledge to successfully navigate important areas of their life, whether that is women, finances, or their career. These pillars represent areas that can make or break a man. Many here have made mistakes in the past and found themselves searching for answers. Why did she leave? Why is she not sleeping with me? Why is she constantly breaking my balls? We’re doers, thinkers, and problem solvers, and nothing is more frustrating to have questions that seem to have no rational answers to them.

Enter the Red Pill

The Red Pill has made an entrance just in time to give a semblance of answers. At the very least telling one of the dangers he faces as he navigates the Sexual Market Place. The dangers are there, and many have already fallen trap to being the nice guy, the beta provider, or the caring, supportive boyfriend — only for it all to fall apart. It happened. In fact I believe without the knowledge to avoid these traps, that one will continue to let them happen. The Red Pill gives you the proper knowledge to understand the behavioral aspects behind why women do what they do, and how realistic expectations on women can give you leverage on how to interact with them. Too often we hear or maybe personally experience someone’s life being fundamentally changed due to the decisions of their spouse. Too often is it heard, “It’s like I never even knew her.” Yes, you didn’t know then, but now you do. You now know women are pragmatic who follow their hypergamous instincts of Alpha Fucks, Beta Bucks.

If one were to be honest with himself, and acknowledge that he doesn’t have all the answers, steps can be made to change his future. At the very least he can be more prepared for some of the land mines he will invariably come across. Further, if a man refuses to take responsibility for his life no one can say that he wasn’t warned.

Warnings

We all know what these warning are; we’ve seen ample evidence that these are potential land mines for the average man.

Marriage
In today’s social climate marriage is simply a bad proposition for men. While I’m all for marriage, there is inherently a lot of risk, with little reward. Shit tests invariably increase as you lose your biggest leverage: commitment. The opposite is inversely true for women; marriage is high reward and low risk. At the worst for her it doesn’t work out and she still walks away with child support, alimony, and half your shit, while you’re sleeping on a futon at your buddy’s apartment. Again, I’m pro-marriage, but only marriage that men absolutely understand the risks involved.
Dualistic Nature of Women
Women’s sexual strategy is dualistic in nature, depending on the different time of her life, her strategy revolves around Alpha and Beta abstractions. Most men here already know this, but to those that don’t, the goal is to eliminate Beta behavior, and increase Alpha behavior, or behavior that is indicative of being an Alpha. Under no circumstances should you fall into the trap of being a women’s Beta Bucks at 30, after she has spent the last 12 years on the cock carousel. No matter how many times you’re told to “man up” and commit, they are the same people rah rahing her desire to fuck as many chads as she can in her 20s. Again, your best interest’s are not the point here, it’s all about her sexual strategy, which you’re encouraged to support without any question.
I don’t think the Red Pill is here to determine what life style a man should have or want. Whether one wants to get married or not, that is his own prerogative. What it does offer is the acknowledgment of the social-sexual dynamic at it’s current state. At the very least, from collective experience, it’s apparent that these areas are potential tripping points and need to be acknowledged. There are plenty more to talk about, but that is for another post.

You’re Not Crazy

Let me close by acknowledging how the Red Pill can fundamentally alter your behavioral schema for the better, and what that means for the future. Before swallowing that bitter pill, I believe many men were subject to the whims of the Feminine Imperative, i.e., the assurance that women will be able to successfully satisfy their sexual strategy. This is of course at odds with men’s best interests, but for so many men, inoculated in a culture to ensure her needs over his, it takes a painful experience to wake a man up from this slumber. This is where the Red Pill can come in and show the behavioral schema he followed before: to play nice, to be supportive and caring, was inherently flawed in today’s social climate. What’s even more painful is the idea of how invested he was that doing these Beta things will work. After all, he was told by countless women, from his mom, sisters, friends, and even the movies he watched, all confirmed this is how he attained his needs, only for it to fall apart. Once this happens, this is enough to induce madness on any man.

I did everything she wanted… It wasn’t what she wanted.

I know this frustrating feeling very well. When I was 20, I met a young woman who I quickly grew emotionally attached to. I pulled out my blue pill rule book on how to win her over. It went OK for about 6 months before it started to fall apart. In my desperation I tried harder with my blue pill rule book, doing everything she said would work, only to be met by her revulsion. This was my wake up call. While the breakup sucked, what was more maddening was the thought it could happen again, and again. I couldn’t get one thought out of my head: What the fuck just happened? I felt like I was taking crazy pills as I did everything I was told would work by countless women, by countless plugged in men, by a whole culture sapped in the Feminine Imperative, only for it to blow up in my hands. Obviously there was something going on here that I just couldn’t figure out. I look back now and chuckle at my ignorance. I chuckle now at how I could even be so emotionally attached to another creature with flaws like anyone else. However, what was so maddening for many men, myself included, is the idea that things are not as they seem. That logic can only get you so far when you’re playing the Game while still plugged in. In reality, you’re playing the Game blindfolded, with both of you hands tied behind your back.

Some men are not laughing, as they get half their assets taken from them. Or forced to see their kids only once every two weeks, while their exes do everything in their power to make their kids resent them. They’re sitting in a one bedroom apartment thinking the same thing, What the fuck just happened? Then they stumble on some internet forums, and someone mentions the Red Pill. Intrigued, they do some searching, some digging, and the pieces start to come together. They deny it’s truth, they say, “Nah women are not like that.” They ignore, bargain, walk away, come back, get angry, and finally accept it’s true. Like an ice-cold drink on a hot summers day, it soothes their mind and they realize, I’m not crazy. Things are not as they seem, but I can adapt, I can thrive in this environment.

You’re not crazy, you just had wrong expectations of women. You believed that they inherently hold your best interests before her own. That she’s not pragmatic, and that she’s the true romantic. That what she says outweighs what she does. You’re not crazy, you were mired in a behavioral schema that wasn’t designed with your best interests in mind.

Yeah, you messed up, but I’d rather fail with at least a semblance on how to not fail again. At least give me the fucking courtesy to try and fix my shit. The alternative is being lost in the forest, unable to see the forest for the trees. Well, here you go, the tools and the knowledge are right here. It’s up to you on how much or how little you use them.